Hey mafiosos, I was thinking to start a thread where we can reminisce on our most horribly frustrating DIYs.
Part of my starting this is to vent on what a B***H it was to replace my tranny cooler line and change the fluid. So here goes:
It started out pretty easy as I unplugged both ends of the cooler line. The push release connection came off fairly easily using a pair of bent needle nose pliers. No need for that special tool. the side connecting to the tranny also popped right out. So then I tried to snake this kinked line out, but it wasn't going to happen so easily. I fought it for about 20 minutes and gave up, got my sawzall and cut the line in half from under the car. ATF was flying everywhere and I felt like I was having a slight manic episode. Finally, the old line was out. Now I had to get the new line in. I fought it again, telling myself it was possible, because some e46fanatics did it one time and said it was possible. It wasn't happening. What was meant to be a MAX 2-day project was now turning into a 3-4 day project. I did some more research and ended up lifting the engine a little bit. In the process, I learned my engine mounts need to be replaced soon. The lines seemed to have a little more room to move, but those bends and kinks would not cooperate whatsoever. I found myself wondering why I took this upon myself. Do I think I am some kind of mechanic? I literally only knew how to pump gas and change oil before this. I decided I needed to tackle the thing that was really getting in the way: the steering coupler. First I had to find out what it was, since i had no idea at the time. After finding out, and learning how to remove it, I got a second wind of energy. Too bad that coupler had never been touched and was practically welded on. I spent another couple hours fighting the coupler, turning the wheel, climbing in and out from under the car, until finally it came out. Thanks to this experience, a new steering coupler is in the future maintenance agenda. It would explain the play in my steering wheel. I finally breathed a sigh of relief when the cooling line slipped right into place and occupied the position of the old line. I was kicking myself for wasting my time jacking up the engine and trying to snake the line without removing the main obstacle. A lesson learned.
Now with the new line in place, I left the quick connect unattached because I was planning on filling new ATF through the cooler. Next came the task of removing the tranny fill plug, which I had been fighting for months prior. I tried PB blaster, but no luck. I realized the only way I could get the proper leverage on it would be with a breaker bar. The box-wrench over a torx bit method was just not working. So I unbolted the crossmember, lowered the tranny just enough to get breaker bar in there and I felt a sense of triumph like everything was going to be OK. Wrong. I accidentally used a T-40 instead of a T-45 and completely stripped the plug. Sorrow and feeling of failure filled my life. I was on day 5 of the car being on jack stands. This was starting to put pressure on my family. So I went to home depot and got some stripped bolt extractors. My cousin came over and got that sucker out using the extractor and a pipe wrench (hes an industrial plumber).
Next was the task of draining the tranny, removing the sump, cleaning it and replacing it with new filter and gasket. What a mess. So much. Oil. Everywhere. The sump and most of the underbelly of the car were covered in greasy caked on residue after thousands of miles of oil leaks and dirt/grime. The strongest degreaser I had could not clean the outside of the sump; I had to wash it in the sink with a metal pan sponge. That really seemed to do the trick. Getting the new filter in was a pain, as the old gasket ring was stuck in the tranny from the old filter. I had to scrape it out until I realized it was rubber surrounding a metal ring. I then bent the metal ring and was able to pull it out after a few minutes of fighting it. Getting the sump back on was easy, thankfully.
Next, I was planning on filling the oil through the cooler; but the cooler had other plans. Every time I pumped fluid into the cooler, it just leaked profusely out the way it was coming it. After a few pumps I realized I was just wasting ATF and decided to do it the normal way. I followed the correct procedure, and finished filling after letting the car run, only to realize I did not put in as much ATF as came out (I got over 2 gallons of old ATF out, and put in just under 2 gallons). So now I have to resume the refill tomorrow morning, and hopefully that will conclude this horrible horrible project I had to endure this week. My car has been on jack stands for a week now, and I am ready to have the garage clean again and drive like a normal person. Yeah, I probably saved hundreds of dollars doing this on my own, but I think it took a toll on my health. Hopefully it's not as bad next time. What an ordeal.
Can anyone top that?