DIY Nightmares

[papa_g]

Hey mafiosos, I was thinking to start a thread where we can reminisce on our most horribly frustrating DIYs.

Part of my starting this is to vent on what a B***H it was to replace my tranny cooler line and change the fluid. So here goes:
It started out pretty easy as I unplugged both ends of the cooler line. The push release connection came off fairly easily using a pair of bent needle nose pliers. No need for that special tool. the side connecting to the tranny also popped right out. So then I tried to snake this kinked line out, but it wasn't going to happen so easily. I fought it for about 20 minutes and gave up, got my sawzall and cut the line in half from under the car. ATF was flying everywhere and I felt like I was having a slight manic episode. Finally, the old line was out. Now I had to get the new line in. I fought it again, telling myself it was possible, because some e46fanatics did it one time and said it was possible. It wasn't happening. What was meant to be a MAX 2-day project was now turning into a 3-4 day project. I did some more research and ended up lifting the engine a little bit. In the process, I learned my engine mounts need to be replaced soon. The lines seemed to have a little more room to move, but those bends and kinks would not cooperate whatsoever. I found myself wondering why I took this upon myself. Do I think I am some kind of mechanic? I literally only knew how to pump gas and change oil before this. I decided I needed to tackle the thing that was really getting in the way: the steering coupler. First I had to find out what it was, since i had no idea at the time. After finding out, and learning how to remove it, I got a second wind of energy. Too bad that coupler had never been touched and was practically welded on. I spent another couple hours fighting the coupler, turning the wheel, climbing in and out from under the car, until finally it came out. Thanks to this experience, a new steering coupler is in the future maintenance agenda. It would explain the play in my steering wheel. I finally breathed a sigh of relief when the cooling line slipped right into place and occupied the position of the old line. I was kicking myself for wasting my time jacking up the engine and trying to snake the line without removing the main obstacle. A lesson learned.

Now with the new line in place, I left the quick connect unattached because I was planning on filling new ATF through the cooler. Next came the task of removing the tranny fill plug, which I had been fighting for months prior. I tried PB blaster, but no luck. I realized the only way I could get the proper leverage on it would be with a breaker bar. The box-wrench over a torx bit method was just not working. So I unbolted the crossmember, lowered the tranny just enough to get breaker bar in there and I felt a sense of triumph like everything was going to be OK. Wrong. I accidentally used a T-40 instead of a T-45 and completely stripped the plug. Sorrow and feeling of failure filled my life. I was on day 5 of the car being on jack stands. This was starting to put pressure on my family. So I went to home depot and got some stripped bolt extractors. My cousin came over and got that sucker out using the extractor and a pipe wrench (hes an industrial plumber).

Next was the task of draining the tranny, removing the sump, cleaning it and replacing it with new filter and gasket. What a mess. So much. Oil. Everywhere. The sump and most of the underbelly of the car were covered in greasy caked on residue after thousands of miles of oil leaks and dirt/grime. The strongest degreaser I had could not clean the outside of the sump; I had to wash it in the sink with a metal pan sponge. That really seemed to do the trick. Getting the new filter in was a pain, as the old gasket ring was stuck in the tranny from the old filter. I had to scrape it out until I realized it was rubber surrounding a metal ring. I then bent the metal ring and was able to pull it out after a few minutes of fighting it. Getting the sump back on was easy, thankfully.

Next, I was planning on filling the oil through the cooler; but the cooler had other plans. Every time I pumped fluid into the cooler, it just leaked profusely out the way it was coming it. After a few pumps I realized I was just wasting ATF and decided to do it the normal way. I followed the correct procedure, and finished filling after letting the car run, only to realize I did not put in as much ATF as came out (I got over 2 gallons of old ATF out, and put in just under 2 gallons). So now I have to resume the refill tomorrow morning, and hopefully that will conclude this horrible horrible project I had to endure this week. My car has been on jack stands for a week now, and I am ready to have the garage clean again and drive like a normal person. Yeah, I probably saved hundreds of dollars doing this on my own, but I think it took a toll on my health. Hopefully it's not as bad next time. What an ordeal.

Can anyone top that?

[oclvframe]

I cannot top that at the moment....although I did have a 'marish experience replacing the thermostat on my zhp. The bottom-most bolt snapped off because it had been sitting in the constant drool of coolant for so long that it was practically corroded all the way through and subsequently frozen into the block. It took 2 or 3 weeks of me spraying it with pb and attempting to grab at it with all sorts of different tools till eventually a buddy of mine with a super steady hand, a right angle air-dril, brand new drill bit and ez-out, and, proper star-alignment to get that little bitch out.

Good to hear you have a handle on where you're at with your refill....hopefully the rest will go smoothly. All that being said, aren't you glad you did it? Aren't you feeling the fantastic feeling of accomplishment that comes with doing these projects yourself? :biggrin

BTW, I am about to pull the trigger on a new waterpump/thermostat for my e61. I will be doing that as well as the OFHGs (yes it has two)! I may be writing up a future nightmare story....keeping my fingers crossed I don't though!

-r

[SaltyNC]

Did you get any pics of the new transmission fluid going into the cooler lines? :ducking

Just kidding, man. What a deal. I'm sorry it was such a hard time, but glad it is behind you. I remember seeing in a DIY somewhere that they said one of the plugs was 40 torx, but it's definitely 45 for both of them, at least on our transmissions it is.

If there is a bright spot in this, it is that you probably won't have to deal with anything else as messy and irritating as this ever again, and thank goodness the plug didn't damage the threads in the transmission case, or that would have really been a pain.

The worst thing I ever did was dropping a valve cover bolt down into the engine when I was around 15 or 16. My poor dad ended up having to get that car towed and the engine torn down by a local mechanic. I felt like a dog for a month. That was 35 years ago.

[papa_g]

It took 2 or 3 weeks of me spraying it with pb and attempting to grab at it with all sorts of different tools till eventually a buddy of mine with a super steady hand, a right angle air-dril, brand new drill bit and ez-out, and, proper star-alignment to get that little bitch out.

Good to hear you have a handle on where you're at with your refill....hopefully the rest will go smoothly. All that being said, aren't you glad you did it? Aren't you feeling the fantastic feeling of accomplishment that comes with doing these projects yourself? :biggrin

BTW, I am about to pull the trigger on a new waterpump/thermostat for my e61. I will be doing that as well as the OFHGs (yes it has two)! I may be writing up a future nightmare story....keeping my fingers crossed I don't though!

-r
That actually sounds bad. The worst part of any nightmare DIY is the frustration and feeling of helplessness you get when things aren't working. Like that urge to admit defeat is really strong, but your ego gets in the way and makes you suffer longer lol. It does feel good to do it alone, but at the same time, I feel like this is just how it has to be because I made myself a promise that I would not pay labor on maintaining this car if I can help it. Good luck on the next project! sounds involved, but fun!

Did you get any pics of the new transmission fluid going into the cooler lines? :ducking

Just kidding, man. What a deal. I'm sorry it was such a hard time, but glad it is behind you. I remember seeing in a DIY somewhere that they said one of the plugs was 40 torx, but it's definitely 45 for both of them, at least on our transmissions it is.

If there is a bright spot in this, it is that you probably won't have to deal with anything else as messy and irritating as this ever again, and thank goodness the plug didn't damage the threads in the transmission case, or that would have really been a pain.

The worst thing I ever did was dropping a valve cover bolt down into the engine when I was around 15 or 16. My poor dad ended up having to get that car towed and the engine torn down by a local mechanic. I felt like a dog for a month. That was 35 years ago.

I actually did get some pics! I will post on my build thread when I get a chance. Yeah I was also amazed how clean and untouched the threads looked. I was expecting them to be corroded with possibly some thread lock on them, but nope. Look like they came straight out of the factory. Yep, both definitely T-45.
That SUCKS about dropping that bolt. I woulda felt like crap too. Good thing my dad never worked on engines lol the only car lesson I got from him was changing a flat tire.

[Newjack]

Can we just link my build thread? I don't think I've ever had to work on my car without swearing or breaking something.

[papa_g]

hahaha how about post your most aggravating DIY in the most dramatic fashion you can muster.

[slater]

great thread. i have a few stories, but all i can think of is nate's gear oil. paging nate...

[Reasoned1]

Can we just link my build thread? I don't think I've ever had to work on my car without swearing or breaking something.

I echo that! This thread was a great idea! I don't have anything approaching the nightmare above, but I did have a HELLUVA time with a strut. The damned thing wouldn't come out of the pinch clamp, so I used the screw to spread it open and managed to deform it just enough to prevent the pinch screw holes from lining up. I had to go buy the biggest, baddest C-clamp in central Vermont to squeeze it back together enough to get the screw in (even damaging the C-clamp in the process due to the force necessary). After that ordeal, I was so wiped out, I got careless and neglected to put the dust cover on, so I had to entirely disassemble the strut again and reinstall. I'm sure you can imagine the stream of expletives that poured out of my mouth at that point... On the plus side, I'm really good at changing struts now.

[papa_g]

Aw man that sucks... I hate when I forget to put a part back in after a job. Most recently i forgot to put the pulley covers back on after reassembling the fan and airbox. Not as bad as your situation, but I had to take the fan back out and those mechanical fans are always annoying for me.

[Sockethead]

I had an F250 with a cracked exhaust manifold. Had to take the fender liner out to get to it. Every single bolt broke off. Some of them were flush with the head. I drilled and tried an extractor but I was afraid it was going to break off. The extractor is hardened so if it breaks you might as well throw the head away because there aint no drilling that out....
Long story short, I had to use my oxy/acetylene torch to heat up the head right next to the broken bolts and use the extractor to turn out the broken stud all the while trying not to melt the head in the process. I think there were 8 on each side.Got them all out then discovered the surface of the head where the exhaust manifold bolted on was so corroded that it wouldn't seal. (Ford exhaust manifolds have a machined surface, no gasket) so I had to go to the parts store and try to find a gasket that worked. Found one, got it back together and sold that bastard as fast as I could. Tore my meniscus in my knee from kneeling under the fender for so long and had to have surgery a few years later to fix it. That was one of many horror stories with that truck like the time I was getting ready to go plowing and discovered that the whole brake line to the rear brakes was rotted out. Had to replace from front to back making all of the kooky bends with one of those hand held brake line benders. I hated that truck.

Then there was the time I offered to replace the brakes and rotors on my sister's Ford Expedition. Little did I know that the front rotors are notorious for seizing on the hub. My biggest, baddest sledge hammer would not budge it... even with heat. I had to cut it off with my torch but as you know cast iron doesn't cut very well with a torch. Took me two days to get the rotors off...

I have about 40 years of mechanical experience, full of easy jobs and horror stories... brilliant thinking and stupid mistakes... all part of mechanics... which leads to to one of my favorite quotes, which I've posted before : "Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it"

[Newjack]

I had an F250 with a cracked exhaust manifold. Had to take the fender liner out to get to it. Every single bolt broke off. Some of them were flush with the head. I drilled and tried an extractor but I was afraid it was going to break off. The extractor is hardened so if it breaks you might as well throw the head away because there aint no drilling that out....
Long story short, I had to use my oxy/acetylene torch to heat up the head right next to the broken bolts and use the extractor to turn out the broken stud all the while trying not to melt the head in the process. I think there were 8 on each side.Got them all out then discovered the surface of the head where the exhaust manifold bolted on was so corroded that it wouldn't seal. (Ford exhaust manifolds have a machined surface, no gasket) so I had to go to the parts store and try to find a gasket that worked. Found one, got it back together and sold that bastard as fast as I could. Tore my meniscus in my knee from kneeling under the fender for so long and had to have surgery a few years later to fix it. That was one of many horror stories with that truck like the time I was getting ready to go plowing and discovered that the whole brake line to the rear brakes was rotted out. Had to replace from front to back making all of the kooky bends with one of those hand held brake line benders. I hated that truck.

Then there was the time I offered to replace the brakes and rotors on my sister's Ford Expedition. Little did I know that the front rotors are notorious for seizing on the hub. My biggest, baddest sledge hammer would not budge it... even with heat. I had to cut it off with my torch but as you know cast iron doesn't cut very well with a torch. Took me two days to get the rotors off...

I have about 40 years of mechanical experience, full of easy jobs and horror stories... brilliant thinking and stupid mistakes... all part of mechanics... which leads to to one of my favorite quotes, which I've posted before : "Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it"Oh God that truck sounded horrible. I can't imagine having to do jobs like that by myself.

Your brake story reminded me of when I did the brakes on my car. The carrier bolt on the drivers side was frozen and would budge. Used a jack and an extension to get plenty of torque on it until I finally heard a crack.

The bolt was still on. My Craftsman socket cracked in half.

"This brake job will be so easy, just go ahead a chug a fucking beer now it's so easy"

https://i.imgur.com/nhqoISv.jpg


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[Reasoned1]

Great quote!

[cornercarver]

This isn’t a DIY nightmare per se, but I think it fits in the category…

I replaced the rear brakes on one of my cars many years ago, only to find that the emergency brake wasn’t working. I couldn’t figure out what was wrong so I took it to the local Meineke (same day) because I knew the manager. He told his guy to bring it into the bay and look at it, but he apparently didn’t tell the guy why I was there. When the guy came out after inspecting it, he didn’t go to the manager first; he came directly to me. Mother F-er told me I needed a complete brake job!! I was stunned. I walked over and told the manager, who was clearly embarrassed, and he went in to talk to his guy. Car came out about fixed about ten minutes later and I left. After that day I swore I would never trust one of those shops again...even if I knew the manager.

[papa_g]

haha reminds me of when i got my alignment done at Firestone. Afterwards they told me I need full brake job, as well as new rear control arms, because the camber washers were broken. quoted me $1600 lol

[papa_g]

Then there was the time I offered to replace the brakes and rotors on my sister's Ford Expedition. Little did I know that the front rotors are notorious for seizing on the hub. My biggest, baddest sledge hammer would not budge it... even with heat. I had to cut it off with my torch but as you know cast iron doesn't cut very well with a torch. Took me two days to get the rotors off...

I am expecting my rotors to be really stuck when I do the brake overhaul on my car. In fact, anything than can be corroded, I am expecting to be corroded. Any tips you can give me, so I can be prepared and not spend more than a day doing this?

[Sockethead]

If you are going to replace the rotors, a BFH (Big F'n Hammer) to the back of the rotor should do it. Coat the surface of the hub where it meets the rotor with a very thin layer of anti-seize compound, hit the centering hub too. Then reassemble.

Also, BMW uses a set of brake shoes inside the rear rotors. There is a good chance that there will be a lip on there and you'll have to back off the adjuster to get the rotor all the way off. When re- assembling, adjust the emergency brake shoes as much as you can at the rear adjuster inside the hub rather than the adjuster at the brake handle. If the one at the brake handle. is used for most of the adjustment, the brake won't hold rolling backwards no matter how hard you pull. I found this out the hard way...

[Johnmadd]

I am expecting my rotors to be really stuck when I do the brake overhaul on my car. In fact, anything than can be corroded, I am expecting to be corroded. Any tips you can give me, so I can be prepared and not spend more than a day doing this?

I used a large 3 jaw puller to get seized rotors off before, works like a charm.

[PetesZ]

on the 2008 550i had to do the Alternator Bracket gasket three times before it was completely done

https://www.pelicanparts.com/techarticles/MISC/BODY-The_Infamous_Alternator_Bracket_Oil_Leak_on_the_E6 5_BMW_7-Series/BODY-The_Infamous_Alternator_Bracket_Oil_Leak_on_the_E6 5_BMW_7-Series.htm

First time - had two extra bolts (one is hidden by the bracket and if you miss it you never find an open hole).

second time - one extra bolt (different one)

Third time - all bolts re-installed in proper places

well work the $5 gasket.

[papa_g]

that's so annoying
"Who designs an engine with a hole in it that does nothing, seal the hole with a $5 gasket that leaks, and requires removing several engine components, along with the engine mount, and 8 to ten hours of labor to replace?"
one of those jokes you laugh at, but on the inside, you are in the fetal position and breathing into a paper bag.

[JPMo]

This post is going to be so frustrating to read, but I have one for you guys:

Im a young guy and have very minimal experience wrenching.

Back story: I had just gotten my ZHP back from a Mini cooper mechanic my brother met while taking his mini in for service at the dealer. He owns an E36 with S52 motor and worked for BMW in the past...blah blah, I thought he would be competent enough chase down the CEL and replace my CCV system. Fairly straightforward job, he says I should get the ZHP back by the next day. 2 weeks later, I get the ZHP with a new CCV, a used DISA, a used air distribution piece and no CEL. Thankfully all issues resolved but the fiasco surrounding that is a whole other story.

The next day, I decide to change my power steering fluid and reservoir with the associated low pressure hoses as my steering had become noticeably heavy and it appeared to be leaking. Decided to throw in the oil cap gasket too, because why not. Again should be fairly straightforward, watched a couple youtube videos and decided to go for it.

Gasket comes out easy. Reservoir and one of the hoses come out easy. Second hose has a broken quick release system and appears to be the source of the issue as its clearly been leaking horribly for some time. @#$&! My brother and I spend a good 2 hours trying to find a way to release the tabs and get the hose out but its not budging. Make a trip to O'Reilly's and find a Ford heater hose quick connect tool which looks like it should fit perfectly. It doesn't. We waste another hour or 2 trying to make it work. Its now dark, cold and raining and we're getting desperate. We then decide "Forget it" and make a trip to ACE hardware and buy a dremel to cut that SOB off, it was our first time ever using a dremel but we miraculously made it work without incident. We put everything back together and get to reinstalling the airbox. The final stretch. I attempt 3-4 times but the airbox doesn't seem to be sitting right. "Alright", i tell myself, "one more try" as I'm grabbing the front of the airbox with one hand and the MAF connected to the airbox with the other hand (**key detail** EVERY OTHER TIME I've taken out the airbox, I've left the MAF on the intake boot. WHYYYYY did I leave it on the airbox this time??), when I hear SNAP and feel a piece of plastic fall through my fingers. @#^&@!!! I'd broken a random plastic piece from within my MAF and I have no clue what it does. At this point I'm stressing, I had a spare MAF in the basement but I'm not sure it works or where its from as the PO gave it to me. I put everything back together, wishing for a miracle, and realize I left out the replacement oil cap gasket, "whatever" I think, i'll handle it in the morning. Start the car and CEL comes on after a few seconds. @#$&#@&*#$@&!!!!! At this point its like 9pm. I run down to the basement and grab the other MAF and slap it on the car. CEL still on. I go for a short spirited drive and the CEL is still on. At this point, I'm done with the car and can't bother to mess with it anymore. Went inside, took a shower, looked up replacement MAF prices and went to sleep pissed.

The next morning, I go back out and replace the Oil cap gasket and like magic the CEL comes off. I then vowed to never work on the ZHP as long as I live.

[danewilson77]

:rofl

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[papa_g]

really the worst part about these involved jobs is the frustration and feeling of helplessness. But when you finish you're just relieved it is all over. Reminds me of my sex life.

[sillieidiot]

lol I have so many of these moments. Although I got hurt in a few of them as well. All it does is piss you off even more cause now you still have to finish the job, but because you're injured, everything takes that much longer.

[Sockethead]

lol I have so many of these moments. Although I got hurt in a few of them as well. All it does is piss you off even more cause now you still have to finish the job, but because you're injured, everything takes that much longer.

LOL ain't that the truth!

[704sw]

The worst part of any nightmare DIY is the frustration and feeling of helplessness you get when things aren't working. Like that urge to admit defeat is really strong, but your ego gets in the way and makes you suffer longer lol.

I could not have said it any better myself. The feeling of utter despair, looking around the garage at the post-disaster area that is your entire tool collection scattered about, ripping your gloves off in a fit of rage, and giving out one good, loud “*#$%!!!,” all the while thinking “where the (bleep) is my (bleeping) phone, this was NOT part of that DIY thread...”


It does feel good to do it alone, but at the same time, I feel like this is just how it has to be because I made myself a promise that I would not pay labor on maintaining this car if I can help it. Good luck on the next project! sounds involved, but fun!

This is the first car I’ve really done any maintenance on, outside of basic crap like oil changes. I did mods on the Mazda like splicing from the fuse box for the “indie fog mod,” or my full-on projector HID retrofit, but nothing like taking apart major sections of the drivetrain. I knew learning to turn a wrench would be a mandate when buying this car, and I’m honestly impressed with what I’ve been able to do thus far.


great thread. i have a few stories, but all i can think of is nate's gear oil. paging nate...

I did it too. I was so ashamed of the carelessness that had led to overflowing diff fluid I didn’t bother telling Nate—I knew the laughter would be boisterous, while still managing to eke out a “that sucks” between the many “ha’s” that would follow. That little bastard just slipped out of my fingers and in the funnel it went!

[SaltyNC]

That diff fluid spill story from Nate made me laugh harder than anything I've read so far here, because I know just how nasty that smell is, and I could appreciate the disaster. Even wearing gloves and not spilling any, you still have that smell on your body for a day that just won't go away. I did my diff change in the driveway well away from the house. I didn't want that stuff anywhere near our concrete in the garage.

[danewilson77]

really the worst part about these involved jobs is the frustration and feeling of helplessness. But when you finish you're just relieved it is all over. Reminds me of my sex life.
lol I have so many of these moments. Although I got hurt in a few of them as well. All it does is piss you off even more cause now you still have to finish the job, but because you're injured, everything takes that much longer.
LOL ain't that the truth!
I could not have said it any better myself. The feeling of utter despair, looking around the garage at the post-disaster area that is your entire tool collection scattered about, ripping your gloves off in a fit of rage, and giving out one good, loud “*#$%!!!,” all the while thinking “where the (bleep) is my (bleeping) phone, this was NOT part of that DIY thread...”



This is the first car I’ve really done any maintenance on, outside of basic crap like oil changes. I did mods on the Mazda like splicing from the fuse box for the “indie fog mod,” or my full-on projector HID retrofit, but nothing like taking apart major sections of the drivetrain. I knew learning to turn a wrench would be a mandate when buying this car, and I’m honestly impressed with what I’ve been able to do thus far.



I did it too. I was so ashamed of the carelessness that had led to overflowing diff fluid I didn’t bother telling Nate—I knew the laughter would be boisterous, while still managing to eke out a “that sucks” between the many “ha’s” that would follow. That little bastard just slipped out of my fingers and in the funnel it went!Amen

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[oclvframe]

So....I guess I set the stage for my day yesterday in the second post of this thread. I've been expecting and planning to do the electric water pump on my e61 for quite some time. They're always known to die at around 80k....here I am at 106K and recently had a thermostat code....so I pulled the trigger and purchased the needed parts. Figured I'd do the OFHGs while I was already dealing with an empty cooling system.

Yesterday morning, I got up bright and early and started the tear-down. Because its so easy and gives tons of room, I removed the fan so after draining all the coolant, I had a ton of room to work....or so I thought. I eventually got stuck trying to remove two band clamps who's 6mm heads were no where I could reach. Deep above the front suspension brace. I tried every possible tool I had: flex drivers, long screw-drivers, you name it. I was getting very frustrated so I called a guy I know that is a BMW mechanic at a BMW dealer in Macon. He gave me other ideas of how to get to them so I kept trying. The more I tried, the more frustrated I got. I could see them...I could even land a tool on them...but had no way to turn them. Then eventually I came to realize the seven if I got them loose, Id have no way to pull the attached hose off. At some point, between texting my buddy, he actually offered to do it for me on the lift in Macon (1-1/2hrs away). I really didn't want to have to bother him and do that so I kept trying. Well....by mid afternoon I was beaten....head throbbing, sick stomach...feeling like a total failure, I put it all back together and filled the cooling system back up and called it a day. Oh, I did happen to notice that my trans-pan was soaked....I recently had the zf serviced with new fluid and a new pan so I figured something was up. After putting everything back together I went to the transmission shop and they found that the new pan apparently has the fill plug only finger tight. So by the time I got home around 6pm...I WAS TOAST!!!!!

This morning I got up, made a biscuit and coffee, and got on the road. Was in Macon by 8:30. My buddy had the water pump and t-stat all installed and then proceeded to do the OFHGs as well as clean the living snot out of the whole front and side and bottom of the motor where oil had just made a mess and was all done by 11:30. Absolutely amazing. I guess what he said is perfectly true....the first time you do one they're a bitch, after that, they get a lot easier.

Well....still on my list of things to do are: new akebono euro pads for my e61 and a new hydraulic tensioner on my zhp.....I hope those don't have near this kind of drama!

-r

[papa_g]

wow that's a pain. How much did he charge you for the job? Did he tell you how he got those band clamps off and please tell me he oriented them into a more accessible orientation after the job lol I remember getting the lower intake boot off was a pain because the last time it was serviced the prick who put it back on made the band clamp screw almost inaccessible.
I am also doing the Akebono euro pads soon. Sitting in my garage with some Zimmermann drilled rotors and some SS brake lines :)

[oclvframe]

wow that's a pain. How much did he charge you for the job? Did he tell you how he got those band clamps off and please tell me he oriented them into a more accessible orientation after the job lol I remember getting the lower intake boot off was a pain because the last time it was serviced the prick who put it back on made the band clamp screw almost inaccessible.
I am also doing the Akebono euro pads soon. Sitting in my garage with some Zimmermann drilled rotors and some SS brake lines :)

Well....the band clamps were actually accessible with the proper tools....between some flex drivers he had and long skinny screw-drivers, he got both of them. Having the car up on a rack was pretty critical to this as was removing the aluminum reinforcement plate under the motor. I suppose I could've removed it too but even he had to contort to get to them while standing under the vehicle so all things considered, it was being on a lift that made the most difference. I knocked all 4 corners on my Odyssey today with no issues...new rotors on the front and all new pads all around. They don't make Akebono Euros for it but I got the better ceramic pads in hopes they're as dustless as the euros!

Still need to do the Akebonos on the e61 but that will have to wait till another day!

-r

[sillieidiot]

wow that's a pain. How much did he charge you for the job? Did he tell you how he got those band clamps off and please tell me he oriented them into a more accessible orientation after the job lol I remember getting the lower intake boot off was a pain because the last time it was serviced the prick who put it back on made the band clamp screw almost inaccessible.
I am also doing the Akebono euro pads soon. Sitting in my garage with some Zimmermann drilled rotors and some SS brake lines :)

If you're talking about the clamp that is upside down connected to the engine side. That's how it comes from the factory. It's quite easy to actually get it from below now that I have a lift lol, but I still turn it around when I reinstall it cause it's not like I always use the lift to do shit.

[oclvframe]

If you're talking about the clamp that is upside down connected to the engine side. That's how it comes from the factory. It's quite easy to actually get it from below now that I have a lift lol, but I still turn it around when I reinstall it cause it's not like I always use the lift to do shit.

Yes, the lift made all the difference....as did having some long skinny and flex drivers that reached.....

-r

[ZHPizza]

I knew learning to turn a wrench would be a mandate when buying this car, and I’m honestly impressed with what I’ve been able to do thus far.

You've been learning by fire (northern car) and you've come so far. I'm hella proud of you, bruh. There is a lot of stuff that will just take time and experience for you to get a feel for, like overtorqueing fasteners and stripping stuff out. I have the advantage of not only 15 years of wrenching on cars, but a lot of experience in machine building and such where I've broken/stripped/destroyed a slew of parts. Every painful snap of a bolt head is a learning experience that will help you get a feel for the limits.



I did it too. I was so ashamed of the carelessness that had led to overflowing diff fluid I didn’t bother telling Nate—I knew the laughter would be boisterous, while still managing to eke out a “that sucks” between the many “ha’s” that would follow. That little bastard just slipped out of my fingers and in the funnel it went!

This thread and the exact same thing happening to me with the diff fluid should be proof enough of that this stuff happens to everyone no matter the experience level. I mean of course I would laugh, because what else can you do? It's almost cartoonish when the stars align so perfectly to screw up a project like that.


That diff fluid spill story from Nate made me laugh harder than anything I've read so far here, because I know just how nasty that smell is, and I could appreciate the disaster. Even wearing gloves and not spilling any, you still have that smell on your body for a day that just won't go away. I did my diff change in the driveway well away from the house. I didn't want that stuff anywhere near our concrete in the garage.

Dude. Whenever I drop the car down on my quickjack it blows some ATF fumes into the air and it's just stank enough to cause some Vietnam style flashbacks to my diff fluid bath.

*Shudder emoji*

[papa_g]

Can someone explain to me the Nate diff fluid spill, or point me to the thread that contains said information?
I want to make sure it doesn't happen to me when i go to change my diff fluid.

[ZHPizza]

Can someone explain to me the Nate diff fluid spill, or point me to the thread that contains said information?
I want to make sure it doesn't happen to me when i go to change my diff fluid.:(

http://www.zhpmafia.com/forums/showthread.php?p=547854

[BMWCurves]

:(

http://www.zhpmafia.com/forums/showthread.php?p=547854

I'm sitting here laughing, acting like I haven't done something like that before.

[san]

I'm sitting here laughing, acting like I haven't done something like that before.

Every single oil change. Especially when trying to get the drained oil back into the bottles.


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[papa_g]

ohhh so it was that bastard plug that did the job. ok, noted. I will pray the night before, and the morning of, and not drop the plug when draining. I also have a beard, but i'm trying to stay single for now, so if no one wants to kiss me idgaf

[papa_g]

My oil pan gasket is next. It is definitely leaking. Not dripping, more like sweating at this point. I am sure I will have a story for that one...

[Sockethead]

It's not too bad... just a lot of work. There are a couple of hidden bolts in the back of the pan where it meets the bell housing... if you miss those, then you'll be swearing at it. It would be a good time to check/replace your motor mounts if you haven't done that already.

[BMWCurves]

There’s some preventative measure for the oil pump nut, but I’m not super familiar with it


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[Sockethead]

You can check it to see if it's loose. If it's not, leave it alone.

If it is loose, take it off clean up the threads, make sure there is no oil on the threads and use Loctite red on it.

Chances of it being loose are pretty slim

[BMWCurves]

I thought there was something more involved or permanent, but I guess not. TIL!


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[704sw]

I thought there was something more involved or permanent, but I guess not. TIL!


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They make a nut with a hole drilled through it and wire to tie it so it can’t back out. I think TMS and ECS sell it.

[papa_g]

Just got finished installing a new AC condenser, receiver, schrader valves and expansion valve, as well as new o-rings. The bolt holding one of the ac lines to the double pipe thing that goes to the expansion valve snapped in half while I was trying to remove it. Spent 2 days trying to remove the broken bolt from that double pipe thing using everything I could think of. Torch, penetrating spray, vice grips, extraction bits, drill, but nothing worked. That bastard was practically welded in there. So I went and bought the pipe from a guy parting out his e46 for $10 and called it good. Put the AC back together, vacuumed it, then put in new freon, just to learn that it still isn't working. Compressor engages, but doesn't seem to pull pressure from the low side to the high side. I give up. Gonna let a shop handle this. I just hope it's an easy fix and not gonna require a new compressor...

[Sockethead]

Was there oil in the system? It needs that. Also the compressors have a habit of leaking...

[704sw]

Was there oil in the system? It needs that. Also the compressors have a habit of leaking...

Mine’s been dripping green shit from the high pressure release valve on the bottom of the compressor since I bought it. It still blows cold, but it’s dripping green alien blood on my front sway bar. I’m going to hold off replacing it until I stop getting cold air.

[papa_g]

Was there oil in the system? It needs that. Also the compressors have a habit of leaking...

My compressor isnt leaking. confirmed by UV dye test and sniffer. clutch engages when lowside pressure reaches ~30psi, so are you saying it's possible the compressor isn't doing its job because of lack of oil?

[brettbimmer]

My compressor isnt leaking. confirmed by UV dye test and sniffer. clutch engages when lowside pressure reaches ~30psi, so are you saying it's possible the compressor isn't doing its job because of lack of oil?If the system is vacuumed, sealed, and properly charged and still not "compressing" or getting a high/low pressure difference, my bet is on the compressor being bad. They need oil for lubrication PAG oil usually, though it can vary between compressor models. How many miles on the car/compressor? Do you use the auto mode on climate control settings all the time? This seems to make the compressor run heavily in my experience.

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[papa_g]

If the system is vacuumed, sealed, and properly charged and still not "compressing" or getting a high/low pressure difference, my bet is on the compressor being bad. They need oil for lubrication PAG oil usually, though it can vary between compressor models. How many miles on the car/compressor? Do you use the auto mode on climate control settings all the time? This seems to make the compressor run heavily in my experience.

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At this point the compressor is the only culprit, I just hope it's a relatively easy fix. Almost 90k on the car now, but I bought it at 84k, and AC was not working back then either. I have not used the AC for that reason, so I never really fiddled with the climate control. One shop already told me the compressor was fine, but I think they based this on the fact that the clutch engages, and it does not make any funny sounds.

[brettbimmer]

At this point the compressor is the only culprit, I just hope it's a relatively easy fix. Almost 90k on the car now, but I bought it at 84k, and AC was not working back then either. I have not used the AC for that reason, so I never really fiddled with the climate control. One shop already told me the compressor was fine, but I think they based this on the fact that the clutch engages, and it does not make any funny sounds.That seems like really low mileage to have a problem, but if the system was vacuumed down, charged, and it is still not compressing with high & low pressures, it's likely the compressor. If needed, check out www.realoem.com for proper compressor match to your VIN.

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[PetesZ]

So the passenger door lock actuator failed on the track car 2005 SGM coupe ZHP.

with the door shut. Nothing works to open it. Bought a new actuator and gave up before a potential super ugly diy.

Local shops problem.

:facepalm

[papa_g]

So the passenger door lock actuator failed on the track car 2005 SGM coupe ZHP.

with the door shut. Nothing works to open it. Bought a new actuator and gave up before a potential super ugly diy.

Local shops problem.

:facepalm

you'd think there was some way to open the door in this kind of situation. Have you done a search?

[papa_g]

That seems like really low mileage to have a problem, but if the system was vacuumed down, charged, and it is still not compressing with high & low pressures, it's likely the compressor. If needed, check out www.realoem.com for proper compressor match to your VIN.

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I am biting the bullet and asking an online professional to review my problem. I paid $5 for a 1-week trial lol justanswer.com.

[brettbimmer]

I am biting the bullet and asking an online professional to review my problem. I paid $5 for a 1-week trial lol justanswer.com.Good luck & keep us posted!

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[Sockethead]

My compressor failed at low mileage... the car was only 4 years old when it failed

[papa_g]

...check out www.realoem.com for proper compressor match to your VIN.
There seems to be two part number for my particular car: 64526910458 & 64526916232. I did a search and don't really see the difference. Is there one?

My compressor failed at low mileage... the car was only 4 years old when it failed
lame. What were the signs other than your a/c not working?

[Sockethead]

It was leaking oil. Still cold though. Got it replaced last week of CPO warranty

[Smolck]

At this point the compressor is the only culprit, I just hope it's a relatively easy fix. Almost 90k on the car now, but I bought it at 84k, and AC was not working back then either. I have not used the AC for that reason, so I never really fiddled with the climate control. One shop already told me the compressor was fine, but I think they based this on the fact that the clutch engages, and it does not make any funny sounds.

A|C compressor job on these cars is simple. Go at it from underneath, I find that easier. Hardest part is removing all those bolts holding the aluminum under panel.

[Fenrir]

Replacing/repairing the K Jetronic fuel injection on both of my E21s.. Uuuuuuugh. Next 320i I get is getting double Weber. Chasing down what felt like miles of vacuum lines for leaks after doing an engine rebuild is a pain. Riiight when you think you've got it all figured out.. Nope. The vacuum leak pixies strike again. Then when that is figured out, the electric system will rear it's head. All 100 of them. Fix the hazard switch by just buying five new ones. Done. Nooow the turn signals dont' work. Fuse box issue. Cool. Oh... wait.. The injection is wonky again. That said.... I'd do it all over again.

The ZHP has, so far, been nightmare free. It's been pretty home mechanic friendly all things considered.

[papa_g]

A|C compressor job on these cars is simple. Go at it from underneath, I find that easier. Hardest part is removing all those bolts holding the aluminum under panel.
aluminum underpanel? i thought the compressor could be removed with just the splash guard out of the way.

Anyway, talked to a bmw tech online. He said it is odd the compressor would be spinning and look and sound in good working order, but not pulling freon toward the high end. Recommended I flush the lines and flush the compressor filter to rule out any obstruction. Also that I replace the oil. Guess I'll give it a try?

[papa_g]

Replacing/repairing the K Jetronic fuel injection on both of my E21s.. Uuuuuuugh. Next 320i I get is getting double Weber. Chasing down what felt like miles of vacuum lines for leaks after doing an engine rebuild is a pain. Riiight when you think you've got it all figured out.. Nope. The vacuum leak pixies strike again. Them when that is figured out, the electric system will rear it's head. All 100 of them. Fix the hazard switch by just buying five new ones. Done. Nooow the turn signals dont' work. Fuse box issue. Cool. Oh... wait.. The injection is wonky again. That said.... I'd do it all over again.

The ZHP has, so far, been nightmare free. It's been pretty home mechanic friendly all things considered.

dude i dont even understand half the sht you're saying but that sounds like a headache

[Fenrir]

dude i dont even understand half the sht you're saying but that sounds like a headacheHaha welcome to E21 ownership. The later model E21s used a mechanical fuel injection system. If there's a vacuum leak, well it doesn't work so well. And chasing down a vacuum leak on a car from 1983 is a pain. A common thing is to switch to a pair of Weber carburators. Solves the mech injection issues and sounds great. Just takes a lil time and elbow grease.

The hazard switches in the E21 also act as a fuse of sorts for the turn signals. Also, the hazard switch breaks rather often. Sooooo if one goes, all sorts of gremlins arise. That said, the car is pretty easy to work on and future proofing any real issues isn't hard.

I've owned two 320is' and even with the minor headaches, I'd buy one all over again.

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[papa_g]

Haha welcome to E21 ownership. The later model E21s used a mechanical fuel injection system. If there's a vacuum leak, well it doesn't work so well. And chasing down a vacuum leak on a car from 1983 is a pain. A common thing is to switch to a pair of Weber carburators. Solves the mech injection issues and sounds great. Just takes a lil time and elbow grease.

The hazard switches in the E21 also act as a fuse of sorts for the turn signals. Also, the hazard switch breaks rather often. Sooooo if one goes, all sorts of gremlins arise. That said, the car is pretty easy to work on and future proofing any real issues isn't hard.

I've owned two 320is' and even with the minor headaches, I'd buy one all over again.

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LOL thank you for the translation. I am not familiar with the e21s, are they more desirable from a collector's standpoint than the e30s?

[Fenrir]

LOL thank you for the translation. I am not familiar with the e21s, are they more desirable from a collector's standpoint than the e30s?Thaaaaaat depends on the collector. Short answer. Nope. They're sort of the red headed step child between the 2002 and the E30. That said, a lot of the features that began to appear in the BMW 3 series line first showed up in the E21. Like the dash angled toward and focused on the driver. They can be had for reasonable prices and have a charm of their own. And you'll see fewer of them than E30s.

They're the genesis of the 3 series line and are very fun little cars. Big trunk (for their size), reasonable on fuel, and with a bit of preventative maintenance (they're over 30yrs old) awesome daily drivers.

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[704sw]

LOL thank you for the translation. I am not familiar with the e21s, are they more desirable from a collector's standpoint than the e30s?

My understanding is they’re the forgotten about generation between two very desirable cars (2002 and E30). I think they look killer, but I’ve got an E30 itch to scratch first [emoji849]

Edit: dammit he typed faster than I did.

[Fenrir]

My understanding is they’re the forgotten about generation between two very desirable cars (2002 and E30). I think they look killer, but I’ve got an E30 itch to scratch first [emoji849]

Edit: dammit he typed faster than I did.ROFL. You're spot on though. And I love em. More than I like the E30..... Except the E30 M3...... I need one.

As far as the E21 is concerned. They're fussy, they don't like you very much, you'll expand your vocabulary when fixing one, and they know a lot of the younger bimmer croud doesn't even know they exist. But God they are rewarding and fun little machines. It's a car that you can learn on. And it pays dividends when you're behind the wheel.

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[Karl Lazlo]

As far as the E21 is concerned. They're fussy, they don't like you very much, you'll expand your vocabulary when fixing one, and they know a lot of the younger bimmer croud doesn't even know they exist. But God they are rewarding and fun little machines. It's a car that you can learn on. And it pays dividends when you're behind the wheel.

Spot on. My first BMW was an E21 323i baur, it got me hooked; I will forever own something with a Roundel on it.

[Fenrir]

Nice!!! My first one was a 320i. Later on I got my hands on an IS. After I had the first car, the bug had definitely bitten me. I've been a consistent bimmer owner ever since without regret :).
Spot on. My first BMW was an E21 323i baur, it got me hooked; I will forever own something with a Roundel on it.

Sent from the missing 10mm